St. Christopher & Me

St. Christopher is looked upon by many Catholics as the patron saint of travelers.  As I wrote here, Catholics have patron saints for everything.  Being in a position that requires a fair amount of travel, I’ve always kept St. Christopher in my thoughts (and even carried a medallion for awhile), figuring I can use the additional help any time I’m on the move.  I have recently read, however, that the Vatican “de-canonized” him in the late 20^th century.  (Why wasn’t I consulted?  I actually like this saint and know what he does!  What about St. Kitt’s? The island is named for him – although I’m not sure how they got Kitt from Christopher.)  Well, he’s still good in my book – and I hope he’s still looking out for me.  Otherwise, I might fall victim to some of these… some of my favorite true-life, “wayward traveler” stories…

            “I knew a guy who knew a guy who…”

            

1)      … Recently arrived in Chicago, took the “L” train to O’Hare to catch a flight to the West coast.  He stood perplexed, bags in hand, at the top of the airport “L” platform vainly searching for Southwest Airlines among the half-dozen terminals and hundreds of carriers, only to have the cruel realization dawn upon him that Southwest only flies out of Midway Airport.  (Note: A sympathetic Southwest operator booked him on the first flight out of Midway the following morning, at no cost and against typical company policy, and he didn’t miss the wedding he was headed for.  This guy milked “sympathetic” out of seasoned travel pros a lot!)

2)      … Was pretty cavalier about those pesky “minimum standards” for arrival time prior to a flight – and by arriving at an airport too late, caused his own sister to miss the birth of the first grandchild in the family.

3)      … Spent a night on the floor at Atlanta’s Airport, having flown a delay-ridden series of Air France flights from Germany, through Paris, only to find out he’d missed the last connection of the night to his hometown – only days after a hurricane has caused massive evacuations from Florida and filled every hotel room within 30 miles of the airport.  (Note: Sleeping adjacent to a ticket counter and jetway is inadvisable in December – it gets really cold, really quickly when that door opens for the first time at 5am.  Cold is also what his bags got, when they ended up in Anchorage that day.)

4)      … Being a responsible runner, always carried his driver’s license in his sweatpants while running, causing him to show up at a Chicago airport the day before a major MLS event without any photo ID.  This taking place prior to 9/11/01, he managed to talk his way through security and onto the plane with a media guide photo, credit card and business card for ID.

5)      … Determined to prove that security is still not all that great post-9/11 either, recently showed up at an airport again with no photo ID – and managed to get through security with a Costco card (with convenient photo on back) as his only valid photo ID.

6)      … Upon returning from a week in Italy and headed straight for the Baseball Winter Meetings in Boston (winter meetings = December), had the misfortune of his luggage traveling four time zones – and three business days - on their own accord.  The luggage arrived in Boston the day it was time to leave for California. (I think he still has a Christmas tie purchased in a hotel gift shop in a desperate moment that weekend.)

7)      … Earned the nickname “Crash” during a newspaper internship when, preoccupied with a looming deadline, rear-ended a pickup truck driven by an undocumented person with no insurance, which in turn rear-ended a Mazda sports car driven by a poor commuter who quickly became upset that an accident had been caused by a car two vehicles behind… at a red light when all three cars had been safely stopped and waiting for green.

8)      … Has twice this year entirely missed important events (Doug Hamilton’s memorial service and the NCAA College Cup) due to snowstorms.

9)      … Probably has a dozen other travel “incidents” – most of which don’t qualify as disasters because the destination was reached, the events weren’t missed and the good fortune of St. Christopher was probably stretched to the limit but otherwise looking over his shoulders.

Thanks, St. Christopher.  I see you've been a lot of help to me over the years.  Maybe that's why you were "de-canonized."  Good luck applying for reinstatement.

Comments

[teri]

oh, I know of a few more stories of said traveller. but as you mention none are disasters, just too humorous to mention.
t